I have been driven mad by rain. Too mad to pull stuff
together into a cohesive post. Instead, I give you the imaginatively titled, ‘Stuff
that’s been happening lately’. If you need me, I’ll be under my duvet.
Isn’t the weather just
awful?
I shouldn’t have complained about how hot it was. I jinxed
it. Sorry, everyone in Bulgaria, that was my bad. Within days it got cold
enough to put the woodburner back on. We even had snow on the mountains around
us.
Snow on higher ground. |
Then came the rains. It has rained every day for at least a
week, including three consecutive days of non-stop, heavy rain. I started unravelling
on the first day. On the second, I stomped around the house shouting a lot. By
the third day, I was ready to do serious harm. We ran into an English friend at
the supermarket and she had exactly the same wild-eyed, if-I’d-stayed-indoors-any-longer-I-would’ve-cut-someone
look. I guess it goes to show how spoiled we are (usually, I mean) with the
weather. Two weeks ago we were firing up the pizza oven and eating pizza in the
sunshine.
Come back heat, all is forgiven. (Also, we still haven't got a proper outdoor table yet. Shameful.) |
Easter and dead lamby
lambs
It was Orthodox Easter on 1st May, which means two things:
painted eggs and slaughtered lambs.
We made these on a rainy Saturday. Have I mentioned how rainy it's been? |
Having killed all his lambs, our neighbour brought round a
big portion of roasted meat. I’m not a big meat eater at the best of times, and
I loved seeing his lambs running around the garden every day, so, initially, I
was all, ‘I don’t think I can eat this. They were just leaping around yesterday.’
Then I was like, ‘Okay, maybe just a bit.’ Then, ‘Damn, that’s tasty. More
please.’ Farewell lamby lambs, you were delicious.
Gardening bore
With all this rain, the wonky polytunnel has really come
into its own. All our little seedlings are protected from the worst of the
weather … and the dreaded slugs and snails. This year, the only things we’ve
sown direct are parsnips, dill and coriander – everything else has been raised as
seedlings in pots. It definitely adds a shit ton of work at this time of year
(all the pricking out, potting on, massive use of compost, blah blah blah,
gardening bore), but at least we’ve not lost any seedlings to slugs. Anyway,
the polytunnel is full of life and looking good. The tomatoes are growing up
well and we’ve got our first flowers on the Latah bush tomatoes.
Wonky tomato cave of loveliness. |
One of our many, many seedlings. |
Despite the rain, we are starting to plant things outside in
the ground: courgettes, globe artichokes, swede, turnips and nasturtiums are in
so far. I messed up on the globe artichokes last year – they grew well from
seed but I didn’t realise they needed protection over winter, which was a bit
dim of me considering how cold our winters get. Obviously they all died and I
had to start from scratch this year, like a chump. I must remember to cover
them with something this winter.
Courgettes ready to go in the ground. |
I’m looking forward to seeing how big our ‘Dutch Mammoth’ dill
grows. I’ve sown it all over the garden and it’s supposed to grow to three feet
tall. With a name like that, I’ll be disappointed with anything less. On a side
note, we have discovered that if you put the word ‘Dutch’ in front of anything
– literally anything – it instantly sounds rude. A Dutch mammoth, for instance,
is clearly going to cost you extra in the brothel. Go ahead, try it. Dutch
carpet: 70s-style pubic hair. Dutch aeroplane: an unusual sexual position.
Dutch cartwheel … you get the idea.
Also, we’re trying
to focus more on flowers but it’s not going to plan. In my head our flower
borders create a charming, cottage-garden effect. In real life they’re just utterly
chaotic. There are too-tall plants at the front, small plants shaded out by
neighbours, and, weirdly, far too much purple. Most things are perennials so at
least I can have a shuffle around next spring and try to impose some sort of
order on it. Also, Barney (The Naughtiest Cat in the World) has bitten the heads
off several of my alliums. If he does it one more time I’m going to bite his head off. He also likes to hide
under the rhubarb and ambush other passing cats, which, as you can imagine,
makes him very popular.
Pre-Barney alliums. Try to ignore the chaos underneath. |
More purple. And more rain. |
Thinny, thin, thin
In other news, I am on a very boring diet in preparation for
our trip to Greece this summer. My very boring diet consists of eating no cake
and drinking no alcohol and trying to exercise more. Yawn. I’m on day six of no
alcohol, so that’s going well. However, due to some post-run euphoria* yesterday
I accidentally ate two pieces of cake.
My lunch for the next FOREVER. |
*A 20-minute run, in which I spent half the time walking and
a good five minutes resting at the bus stop. Like a boss.